These are my officemates.
It's this sculpture of these two old dudes in a horseless carriage. They just sit there day in and day out, just as happy and carefree as they were the day before. I often look at them and wonder who they would become if I had the key from The Indian in the Cupboard. We got a new camera because we had to. And by "camera" I mean Canon EOS Rebel T2i. And by "we had to," I mean it was recommended in the syllabus to my Digital Design course at UTA. Which I start tomorrow.
God told me that I was going to spend this year learning humility and discipline. I've been entertaining the idea of calling it "living life in HD." I have a sinking feeling that I know how he intends to teach me those two things, and if I'm right, it'll be a severe case of killing two birds with one stone. Or more like a flock of birds.
In the Spirit of Humility
I have gotten to the point where I'm okay with not saying something. More often than not, I honestly believe that what I have to say will benefit the recipient of my words, or provide meaningful input to the conversation at hand. I'm learning, though, that humility is not found in the process of changing this mindset; instead, it's the decision to hold my tongue in spite of it. It doesn't matter how deep my thoughts or how insightful my perspective - if I'm talking, that means I'm not listening, and thus actively making the decision to pass up an opportunity to learn something.
Be of exceedingly humble spirit,
for the end of a person is the worm.
In the Spirit of Discipline
I've managed to drag myself kicking and screaming into a regimented daily and nightly routine, which I created on the principles of balance. I found that my mornings were too heavy and my nights were too light, so I started making my (and Glennda's) lunch each night for the following day. But even beyond the whole routine thing, I've taken it to the world of daily and weekly tasks that I have convinced myself that I simply must do. I've put a white board on the wall of my room, so that every Sunday night I can map out every task that needs accomplishing the following week, and resolve to get them done. But still, none of this is demonstrative of discipline. It's easy to keep anything up for seventeen days. The discipline element will really come into play when it's not new and exciting anymore. When it's April or July or September and I don't feel like making tomorrow's lunch at 11:30 pm.
The one who conquers others has physical strength;
The one who conquers one's self is strong.
It all comes down to August. If I find myself entering the month of August this year and still have my weekly task map, if I'm still reading a couple books a week, if I continue to pursue a humble attitude and a beginner's mind, if I still make my lunches every night, if there's a noticeable change in my speech and the way I relate to other people - then I will be able to look back and say that I have begun to learn discipline. Of course, there are other ways to learn discipline . . . other more crash-course-ish ways.
I'm hoping to learn my way.
We'll see.
This is all for now.
-R.
